Screwing

Parker loves to screw.
Anything he can get his hands on.

I'm not entirely kidding. He does love to screw. Screw on lids. Of containers. That boy can sit for almost an hour with a milk jug and the lid screwing and unscrewing. He isn't really picky either. Pepsi bottles, spice containers, water bottles, and pretty much anything else that has a cap. So yesterday when he was throwing a fit at the grocery store and I desperately needed to stay and finish shopping, I bought a Gatorade and dumped it out just so that little jerk could screw...in peace!

Ew

I never want to forget the cuteness of this:

Gracie "I just puked in my mouth a little bit, and then I drank it."

Da Huz

Sheesh. I can't believe Jeff forgot today was our 746th day anniversary!
I'm not really into mind games, but asking Jeff "do you know what today is?" is one of my favorites. That look on his face. The "oh shit" look. It's really hard to keep a strait face. Especially when I tell him exactly what day it is.

Here is a short list of the oh so special days he has forgotten:
The anniversary of our first email exchange
The anniversary of our first kiss T
he anniversary of the day I first thought I might be pregant, maybe...
The anniversary of the day we found out I was pregnant
The___th day since I have seen my mom
The ___th day of summer, and only___days until school starts again
My new washer-and-dryer "adoption" anniversary.
The anniversary of the first time we left all the kids with a babysitter
The anniversary of the first time he sent me flowers
I assure you the list goes on!

Oh, and I get the same look when he walks in from work and I say "we need to talk."I love my husband. He makes me laugh every single day. I have smiled at him every morning for the last 746 days. I love him more than I did the day I married him. He still gives me goosebumps and butterflies. I still can't wait for him to come home from work everyday. He still can't keep his hands off me, and he still calls me a dozen times a day. We never fight. Really we don't. Nobody believes me, but it's true. Sure we snap at eachother, but never argue Sometimes I wonder when this is all going to end. When are the feelings going to fade? How long is the "honeymoon" going to last? Am I safe? Am I going to absolutely adore him forever? I hear about people getting divorced after 5, 10, 15, 25 years of marriage and it makes me wonder. When did they stop loving eachother?? Are my fears warranted? I hope not. I could never love anyone other than Jeff, and noone could love me like he does. He rocks my world...you know even though he doesn't remember the exact number of times we've had sex.

Conversations with Parker

Parker has an ever expanding vocabulary. It seems like every hour he is saying something new. One of his first words was ball. "Ba," he says at the sight of anything round. Parker also has the tendency to get stuck on a word. Take for example the following conversation:

Me: Oh look Parker look at the cat! Can you say cat?
Parker: Ba

Me: Cat. Say cat
Parker: Ba

Me: Cat
Parker: Ba

Me: Whatever. Can you say dog?
Parker: Ba

Me: Dog. Dog
Parker: Ba

Me: Dog
Parker: Ba

Me: What about baby. Let me hear you say baby!
Parker Ba

Me: You've said it before. BAYBEEE. Say baby
Parker: Ba

Me: Say Mom
Parker: Ba

Me: Say Dad
Parker: Ba

Me: Say Bye Bye
Parker: Ba

Me: Say Banana
Parker: Ba

Me: Fine, I'll go get you the ball. Say ball
Parker: Do (Dog)

Later in the evening I was getting Parker ready for a bath. I was asking him to point to different body parts, with no response. Everything. Eyes, nose, ears, tummy, feet. Only a blank stare. Then I say "Parker where's your dingy?" He promptly grabs ahold of his package and giggles with delight!See what I'm dealing with?

Never

Here is a short list of things that would never come out of my mouth:
"I love getting up at 6 am."
"Oooh! Make me a sandwich with cold meat!"
"I love being pregnant!"
"I love breastfeeding a giant toddler!"
"I wish I had more laundry to do."
"I hate having a job and feeling productive."
"Sure, I'd love extra tomatoes on my salad."
"Gee, I wish I had more time to watch My Super Sweet 16!"
"No thanks. I don't need a pedicure."
"I think it is so cool how strangers point out that my "hands must be full.""
"I never surf the internet mindlessly."
"I hate Cocoa Pebbles."
"I wish I was pregnant right now."
"Don't bother putting your dishes in the sink."
"Dogs are awesome, I wish I had three!"
"I love it when people count my kids at Fred Meyer."
"Gosh the sink has NO dishes in it."
"Weird. You kids are being soooo quiet!"
"I wish more people would whistle!"
"You kids sit back and relax while I do the dishes."
"We should watch Spongebob Squarepants!"
"Let's watch the Hannah Montana marathon!"
"I have too much clothes!"
"Summer sucks, I can't wait for winter."
"We should get a puppy."
"There just aren't enough coffee stands around here."
"I love hearing you kids bicker!"
"Who wants another cupcake?"
"Cooking for 8 is my favorite thing to do!"
"I love my body!!"
"I love to exercise!"
"I have way too much free time!"
"Craigslist? What's Craigslist??"
"I wish more strangers would ask me if I was running some sort of school."
"I love when people ask me if we are on foodstamps or welfare."
"I just can't get enough of the kids screaming my name!"
"I am so happy the baby learned how to yell MOM."
"I am a MILF!"
"Gee honey. You are so talented, the way you add fart noises to every song on the radio."
"I get so much accomplished during the day!"
"Humming is a talent!"
"I would never leave Alaska."
"People from Wasilla are so classy."